From the Editor – The Second Chance

“Once bitten, twice shy”

Or

“दूध का जला छाछ भी फूँक-फूँक कर पीता है।”

These are some of the proverbs we have practically grown up hearing and, unfortunately, all of us have been “bitten” at least once and, in most cases, multiple times in our lives. All of us experience minor failures every day without realizing their impact on our psychology. At times, these so-called minor failures have such a huge impact on our confidence that we can hardly gather courage for a second try. Every New Year Resolution that we are not able to fulfill leaves us with slightly less confidence in our ability to achieve goals. Each promise that we make to others but are not able to keep, not only impacts the trust others place in us, but also makes us lose faith in ourselves.

photo courtesy http://www.travellingcamera.com

Consider a slightly serious example. I remember from my childhood, one of my friends who was learning to ride a bicycle and having a time of her life while doing it. Unfortunately, she almost had a collision with a car and got shouted at by the car driver for no fault of hers, while a mute crowd stood around throwing accusing glances at her, a 10-year-old child. After that, she was never able to gather enough courage to mount a bicycle again and till date regrets not being able to ride one. But before we go forward with this article, I will, predictably enough, take a break and announce the Featured Story and Featured Author for the month.

Featured Story for the Month of May 2012 is Shrikhand Mahadev Yatra by Sandeep Panwar, popularly known as “JatDevta”. This highly succulent, entertaining account takes you through the remote green peaks and valleys of the Kullu District of Himachal Pradesh, dodging life-threatening situations and, yet, effortlessly making you smile. Click here to read the 14-part series if you haven’t read it already.

Featured Author for the Month of June 2012 is D. L. Narayan, who joined Ghumakkar in November 2011, and since then has written for us 10 beautiful stories, including one very helpful Insights article about the very relevant Plagiarism. Apart from his vivid tales from both domestic and international destinations, he is also appreciated for his thoughtful and positive comments and interactions at Ghumakkar. So do congratulate him and also click here to read his stories, if you have missed reading them earlier.

And, now, coming back to the tale of the girl who gave up riding bicycle – she hasn’t yet gathered courage to give it another try. What makes it even more sad are the avenues she never explored because she did not give herself a second chance considering that she was getting to be quite good at it when the unfortunate incident happened. She could even have become one of the few women cyclists of India. You may think that I’m taking it too far, but you never know! It is sad what fear does to us.

Such challenges present themselves to us travelers all too often. When I had travelled to England for the first time, I was fresh out of an awkward teenage and, moreover, the flight to England was my first flight ever. Excited yet apprehensive, I fumbled my way through the check-ins, security checks, immigration checks, a long flight, and unfortunate interactions with foreign airhostesses. The stay in England was not too pleasant as well. I happened to cross ways with some rude locals and, moreover, my handbag, in which I was foolishly carrying my tickets, my camera, my mobile, and even my passport, was stolen right in front of the Buckingham Palace. The next few days were a nightmare while I lodged an FIR, tried to get travel documents so that I could get back to my dear country, and got my tickets re-issued. I longed to get back to the security of my parents’ house and felt that the entire world was my enemy. At long last when everything was sorted out, I returned to India and vowed never to go back to England ever again.

This was all a long time back but I carried those bad memories and the harsh opinion about the country for quite some time. However, it is said that we are here to learn. And our experiences, our interactions with our surroundings and people we chance upon in life teach us a lot. More importantly, we grow up and so do the people around us. But we don’t take this into account when we tell ourselves “I am never going to do this again.” Secretly we often blame ourselves for the failure even if it is not our fault. Similarly I blamed my inability to cope with International environment for my bad experiences in England even though I never had the courage to admit that to anyone or to myself. Instead I went around badmouthing England to anyone who cared to listen.

One strange fact that I have learnt over years is that you can be mediocre at something for two reasons – either you are not trying enough in the right direction or you are too good for the task. While in my encounter with England, the former was the case, another of my friends suffered because his case was the latter. He was just too good. In school, he used to be a mediocre student, often failing in one subject or the other. But none of his teachers could ever put him down as ‘nalayak’ because everyone knew that inside this disinterested, floundering child was a brilliant mind capable of thoughts far beyond the children of his age. So he was designated as the editor of the school magazine. But as fate would have it, he failed in his boards and had to change schools. I happened to talk to him a couple of times after that and he sounded dejected and very unlike his old self. The school system had taken its toll on his impressionable, sensitive mind and he had told himself that dreaded “never”.

However, I chanced upon him again a few years back and was happy to know that he had completed his Masters in Philanthropy. And now he was not only writing for several major magazines and journals, but was actually working in Afghanistan as a consultant for a development project. Undoubtedly here was someone who had bounced back after being defeated; someone to take inspiration from.

I would be lying if I tell you that meeting this friend transformed me overnight. There were many other factors and several years of growing up involved in the process. And a couple of years back I began considering going back to England once again. I wanted to give the country and myself a second chance. And sure enough, this time it was a completely different experience. I met some of the most interesting people while I was there and saw so many beautiful sights that they made me change my view of the country completely. And in the process, I also got over my fear of international travel.

In my opinion, the proverbs that we talked about in the beginning aren’t “Once bitten, always shy.” and “दूध का जला छाछ भी नहीं पीता।” for a very good reason. These are actually meant to urge us to be careful but to go ahead and try again. The message is not only about learning from our mistakes but also about giving ourselves a second chance.

What do you think? Should my friend who gave up cycling give the sport a second chance? Do you have any such incidents of your own. Feel free to share them through the comments if you do. They might prove to be an inspiration for someone just like my friends were for me.

36 Comments

  • SilentSoul says:

    Congrats to sandeep and Shri D.L.Narayan. I am very happy that a wise and vivid travellor has been chosen as Featured Author.

    Shri Narayan is not only a good writer, but his general knowledge is really so deep that everytime he surprised me with his indepth and wise comments.

    Getting a comment from Narayan had always been a matter of pride and joy for me. It always increased my own knowledge.

    Congrats again DL

  • Surinder Sharma says:

    Vibha very nice writing and unhappy to know about ” ticket, camera, mobile, and passport were stolen in London. It means it is not only happend in India but rest of world you can face same problem. I really like your article thanks for it.

    ??? ?? ??? ??? ??…….., I think our other Ghumakkar can add some other words in it , let us see .

    Regards

    • Vibha says:

      Thanks Mr. Sharma! It is all about being at the wrong place, at the wrong time. Such incidents can happen anywhere!

      Thanks for reading and commenting!

  • Neeraj Jat says:

    ?????? ?? ?????? ?? ?? ?????
    ???? ?? ????? ?? ?????? ?? ????? ????

  • JATDEVTA says:

    ???? ????? ???? ???? ?? ?? ?? ????? ?? ??,

    ????, ?????, ????? ?? ?????? ?? ????? ??, ?? ????? ?? ??? ???? ?? ??? ????????, ??? ??? ????? ???? ?? ???? ??????? ????? ?? ????, ??? ???? ?? ???? ???? ???, ?? ???? ?? ?? ?????? ?? ???? ?????,

    ?? ???? ???

  • JATDEVTA says:

    ?????? ?????? ?? ??
    ?????? ??
    ???????? ?? ?????????? ?? ???

  • Mukesh Bhalse says:

    Kudos to DL Narayana ji for being awarded for Featured author of the month. In fact DL Ji is one of my favorite authors on Ghumakkar and above all he is a best commentator his thoughtful, intelligent and comprehensive comments are all time favourite on ghumakkar.

    Sandeep Panwar – Baer Grills of Ghumakkar / Superman of Ghumakkar as I always call him. His thrilling and entertaining stories are a great contributor to ghumakkar……………So Kudos to him also for featured story.

    Finally Thanks to Vibha and editoril board of Ghumakkar for these smart selections……………..

  • ?????? ?? ?? ????? ?? ?? ???? ?? ???? ???? ????, ????? ???, ?????? ???, ???????

  • Mahesh Semwal says:

    Congrats Sandeep & DL.

  • Congratulations D.L.Narayan

    Its a very well deserved recognition. D.L. Narayan is not only a very good and quality author but also a very knowledgeable person.His stories are precise,well directed and have excellent quality. His technical and spiritual views are amazing. As far as I know ASK D.L. anything, he will have the answers. I give him the tag of ” Mr. Encyclopedia” in Ghumakkar. D.L.jee I am desperately waiting for you interview on 15 to know more about you.

    ?? ?? ??????? ?????? ??.

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

    Yaa Vibha . Your friend should give a second chance to the sport. And you are right we should learn from mistakes. But in extreme cases the above proverbs work . These cases must have hurt the individual emotionally and sentimentally and so he won’t try or repeat them.

    • Vibha says:

      Yes Vishal. In extreme cases it can take quite a while to get over the hurt… But if one wants to do something, one should not let failures come in the way. What say?
      Thanks for reading and commenting!

    • Neeraj Jat says:

      ????? ???,
      ??? ???????? ??? ??? ???? ????
      ?? ??? ????? ??? ?????? ???? ???????? ?? ????? ?? ?? ???
      ??? ?? ????? ??? ??? ???? ??? ????? ??? ?? ??? ???? ??? ?????? ?????….
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      ???????? ????? ????? ?????? ?? ???? ?? ????? ???…. ???????? ?? ?? ?? ???? ???

  • Nandan Jha says:

    Thoughtful editorial. And knowing you, I guess you deserve to write it for all you have done all through. For someone like me, it takes many more tries :-) to get through and I try to keep myself motivated. Curating Ghumakkar for last many years, has definitely made me ready to ‘Keep trying’ lol, since there is no other good, progressive way. The girl must take to the pedal again.

    Congratulations Sandeep. The series has all the great mix of unavailable information, novelty, reading pleasure and exceptional photographs. Enjoy the award and Karmanyawadhikareste.

    Congratulations DL. One of the most respected and admired Ghumakkar of recent times and with your knowledge and wise comments, all of us keep growing. Thank you for being the inspiration. I look fwd to talk to you next week.

    • Vibha says:

      Thanks Nandan! Definitely the girl must take to the pedal again and I hope she will do so soon!

      And your kind words have really made my day. All of us draw strength from each other at some level. Your persistence through good and bad times is a great motivation for me and others who take inspiration from you!

  • Kavita Bhalse says:

    ??.? ?? ,
    ???? ???? ???? ???? ?????? ???? ???? ?? ??? ???? ?? ?? ?????? ????? ????? ????? ??????? ?? ???..

    ????? ??,
    ???? ?? ??????? ???? ???? ????? ?? ?? ??? ???. ???? ?????? ?? ?? ?????? ????? ?? ?? .

    ???????.

  • Congratulations! Well deserved recognition, this is.

  • Bidisha says:

    Congrats Sandeep and DL! Miles to go before you sleep…

    I have already started looking forward to DL’s comments (along with some chosen few more ghumakkars) even if I have posted just a few writeups.

    Kudos to the editorial team for all their devotion and hard work.

    Cheers!!!

  • DL Sir, you are DIL of ghumakkars, belated but….”der aaye durust aaye”.
    Congrats. Ghumakkar family needs the blessings and showers of your knowledge.

    Jiyo mhare Jaat, dil kati khus ho gaya. Man main to nun ave ke akhadhe(arena) ma jake lunger ghamaun er jor jor se janga ne bajaun er raula kar ke sab ne bataun ke mhara(Sandeep) Jatdevta ‘fichre satory af (jethh) June,2012’ ho gaya. Array apne yarran ki gail aaiyo , main tum subne chhak ke ‘doodh jalebi’ khvamna cha reeya hun.

  • Thanks Vibhaji, a psycho article, a tiny mistake committed by the elders/society and particularly by the untrained teachers of “education shops” in the every corner of city harms to future of promising children. The sensitive mind of the children leaves no chance to blow the chhachh even, as they do not share the incidents of hot milk with the friendly elders. They should be inspirated by quoting the examples of failure/success of ours.
    Good article and congratulations to the board of editors for impartial selection.

    • Vibha says:

      Beautifully put Tridev! It is true that we should share such inspirational stories with children so that they can learn to get up after a fall.

  • Ritesh Gupta says:

    @ D.L. Sir ji ,
    You are deserve it for this award and so many Congratulations for being author for the Month of Jun/2012…..

    @????? ??……???? ???? ??? ???? ???????? ?? ?? ?????? ?? ????? ?? ??????….???? ?? ????? ?? ??????? ?? ??? ?? ????? ????? ?? ?? ??? ?? ??? ????? ?? ????? ?? ……|
    “???? ??? ??????” ???????? ?? ????? ?? ??????? ??? ?? ?????? ????? ?? ???? ???? ????…|

    @Vibha ji……Thanks for nice story ??? ?? ??? ??? ?? ????-???? ?? ???? ??? and Thanks for introduce featured with Mr. D.L. Narayan & MR. Sandeep Ji

    Thanks

  • Sudip says:

    Congratulations DL!

  • Harish Bhatt says:

    Congratulations DL Ji and Sandeep bhai…

  • D.L.Narayan says:

    It was a huge surprise when the Editor informed me that I was going to be the Featured Author for this month. However, the outpouring of love and affection from my fellow ghumakkars has been truly overwhelming. I am deeply indebted to all of you for your encouragement and support. “???? ????? ???? ???? ?? ??? ??? ?? ?????….” ?? ?? ?? ?? ??????? ?? ?? ?? ???? ????? ???? ??? ?? ??? ?? ?? ??????? ???? ????? ???? DL ?????? ??? ?? ?? ?? ????? ?? ????, ?? ?? ?????? ?? ????? ????

    Mr. Tridev Charan thought that it was a belated recognition. I would like to assure him that, on the contrary, it came a bit too soon, as there are many authors here who are senior to me and have written brilliant posts. Professor Khamesra, to give one example, got this honour as recently as March this year.

    Congratulations too to Sandeep Bhai, the formidable Jaatdevta. He writes forcefully and vividly in his emphatic and inimitable style and he embodies the spirit of ghumakkari. The legendary mountaineer, George Mallory, was once asked why he wanted to climb the Everest. His answer was profoundly simple – “because it is there.” People like Sandeep are living examples of this philosophy.

    Last, but not the least, I would like to congratulate Vibha on yet another beautifully worded and inspirational editorial. She has reminded us of the adage that failures are the stepping stones to success. Those who succeed are not those who have not tasted failure but those who did not allow negativity to deter them from pursuing their aims. Persistence is the key to success.

  • Manish Kumar says:

    Congratulations DL & Sandeep ! Well deserved recognition.

  • Minakhee says:

    Luvd reading the beautifully written synopsis…Kudos 2 all the well deserved writer.Congrats!

  • Naveena Israni says:

    Congrats Narayan ji and Sandeep ji for this well-deserved honour!

  • ?????? ?? ???? ????? ???? ???? ?? ?? ……….???? ??? ?? ……….??? ?? ?? ???? ?? ??? ?????????? ?? ???? ??? ………
    ???? ?? ?? ?? ?????????? ??? ?? ?? ????? ?????? ???? ????

  • Stone says:

    Ahh…don’t know how I missed this post.

    @ Vibha – another beautifully stitched piece Vibha, thanks for sharing it with us.

    @ DL – Congratulations Sir, like everyone said , your presence is most sought after on this platform; your each post and every comment adds value to reader’s knowledge. I really really look forward to your posts and comments. Regards.

    @Sandeep – ??? ???? ???? ??? ?? ?? ???? ?? ???? ?? , ?? ?? ?????, ???? ?????????? ??????? ?? .
    ?? ???? ??? ???? ??????? ?? ?????? ?????? ????? ???? ?? ??? ??????? .

  • Naman says:

    As always A good post! So, was it a hectic process to visit the Police stations in England (like in india)?

    • Vibha says:

      Dear Naman, Thanks for reading through! No it wasn’t hectic in the police station. In fact the entire process went really smoothly. They assured me that I won’t find my bag ever. LOL

      It seems that such incidents are quite common in that area. They didn’t sound worried or surprised.

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